This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
