i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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