The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize