Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
