I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
