I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
