She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
