ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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