I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
