Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Text me some of your sweat
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
