I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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