Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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