I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
