he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
