no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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