don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I've blown a few things in my day
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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