You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
