Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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