I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
