Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
