think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize