i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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