dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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