I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
