I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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