pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
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