Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
