The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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