doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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