do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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