Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
ugly people sure do ruin things
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
