I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
you told grandpa to call you daddy
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
