i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
