Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
