Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize