question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
