This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Randomize
