Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize