im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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