i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
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My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
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a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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