i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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