i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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