Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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