Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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