I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize