new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
