We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
