just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I think my vagina is haunted
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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