I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
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for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I have tasted many bathrooms
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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