Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
True strength comes from lack of pants
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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