it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize